Beginners Guide to Dildos
Beginners Guide to Dildos
Dildos are one of the most versatile categories of sex toy available. They come without the complexity of batteries or motors, which many people prefer, and they give you direct control over speed, depth and angle in a way that vibrating toys don’t always allow.
If you’re new to dildos and not sure where to start, this guide covers the main types, what each one is actually like to use, and who tends to get the most out of them.
Jelly Dildos
Jelly dildos are made from soft, flexible rubber with enough firmness to be functional. They’re usually the most affordable type of dildo and a popular first purchase for that reason. The softness makes insertion easier than harder materials, and they can be bent or angled as needed. Most are available in a range of sizes and colours.
One thing to be aware of: jelly material is porous, which means it can harbour bacteria if not cleaned thoroughly after each use. Always wash with warm water and a sex toy cleaner before and after.
Good for: First-time dildo users, vaginal or anal penetration.
Realistic Dildos
Realistic dildos are designed to mimic the look and feel of an erect penis as closely as possible. They come with realistic veins, contours and a lifelike texture, often in flesh-tone colours. Many include a suction cup base so you can attach them to a smooth surface for hands-free use. Materials vary across PVC, silicone and jelly, so check the product description before buying if material matters to you.
Good for: Vaginal or anal penetration, solo use, couples play.
Glass Dildos
Glass dildos are handmade from toughened borosilicate glass and are far stronger than they look. They won’t shatter under normal use and are rated to withstand significant pressure. The main appeal is the temperature play they allow. You can warm a glass dildo under a hot tap or cool it in cold water before use, which creates a completely different sensation to other materials.
Glass is also completely non-porous, making it the most hygienic dildo material available. It can be sterilised fully and even cleaned in the dishwasher. These last a lifetime with proper care.
Good for: Temperature play, vaginal penetration, hygiene-conscious buyers.
Harness Compatible Dildos
Harness compatible dildos all have a flared base that keeps them secure when used with a strap-on harness. While they’re designed with strap-on use in mind, they work perfectly well as standalone toys too. Most are made from body-safe silicone for comfort and durability.
Good for: Strap-on play, vaginal penetration, g-spot stimulation.
Anal Dildos
Anal dildos are narrower than standard dildos and often have a slight curve specifically to reach the prostate in men, or to stimulate the back wall of the vagina in women. They usually come with a flared base, which is an important safety feature for any anal toy. Made from soft jelly or silicone, they’re designed to be gentle on the sensitive anal passage.
Always use anal lubricant with any anal toy. The anus doesn’t produce natural lubrication, and going without it is uncomfortable at best.
Good for: Anal penetration, prostate stimulation in men.
Double Ended Dildos
Double ended dildos have a penetrative end at each end, making them suitable for shared use between partners or for solo vaginal and anal stimulation at the same time. Most are long and flexible enough to accommodate both uses. If you’re buying one for anal use at one end, it’s worth checking that the anal end is narrower to make insertion more comfortable.
Good for: Couples play, dual penetration, lesbian couples.
Suction Cup Dildos
Suction cup dildos have a strong base that attaches to any smooth, flat surface including walls, floors, tiles and furniture. Once in place, they stay put, which means your hands are completely free. This opens up a range of positions that wouldn’t be possible with a hand-held toy.
Good for: Hands-free penetration, solo use, positioning variety.
Squirting Dildos
Squirting dildos have a hollow shaft that can be filled with water or a liquid of your choice, then squeezed or pumped to release it during use. They’re designed to simulate ejaculation as closely as possible. Most are refillable and can be used multiple times.
Good for: Realistic simulation, vaginal or anal penetration.
Strap-On Dildos
Strap-on setups pair a harness with a compatible dildo for penetration. They’re commonly used by lesbian couples but are equally popular with heterosexual couples who want to try pegging (where a woman penetrates her male partner). Hollow strap-ons are also available for men with erectile difficulties. Most harnesses take a removable o-ring so you can swap in different dildo sizes.
Good for: Partner penetration, pegging, lesbian couples, erectile dysfunction.
What Size Should You Start With?
If this is your first dildo, smaller is nearly always the better starting point. A dildo that’s too large for your experience level is going to be uncomfortable, and that puts a lot of people off. Once you know what insertion feels like and what you enjoy, you can make an informed choice about going larger.
Most starter dildos range from about four to six inches in insertable length. That’s enough to be satisfying without being overwhelming.
Does Material Matter?
Yes, significantly. Silicone is widely considered the gold standard. It’s non-porous, body-safe, easy to clean, and durable. Glass is the most hygienic material overall but requires more careful handling. Jelly and PVC are softer and cheaper but are porous, meaning bacteria can build up if you’re not thorough with cleaning. Metal dildos are rigid and temperature-responsive, much like glass.
If you have sensitive skin or are prone to irritation, silicone or glass are the safest choices.
